- judgedes other people constantly, so I can consider them as bad and therefore feel better because honestly I feel very worthless.
- want to be perfect, so people admire me and acknowledge the lost value.
- pretend to be interested in other people so they have a good opinion about you and give me my missing self-esteem.
- is untouchable, because he claims never to suffer even though he suffers a lot.
- attracts people who are full of suffering and hopelessness. This way I can help them and become important to cover my own worthlessness.
- attracts people who tell me what to do and where to go, so I don’t need to worry about myself. I make myself to be a victim, so I don’t have to be responsibility.
- judges people who live superficially, because I myself became superficial through all my searching and don’t let anything close anymore.
- is afraid of the unknown, because he thinks he is insignificant and a burden.
Variation: The other responds to every sentence: “I am your mirror.”
At the end you can ask God for transformation, or play anonther round in which you tell each other what you like about the other. Again the response to the other is: “I am your mirror.”
Background and Effect:
The ritual of confession in the Catholic Church gone entirely out of fashion for no reason. Its original purpose was not to get objectively assessable sins wiped clean through absolution of a chosen priest, like you would wash a dirty car, or pay a penalty to the police. On the contrary! The idea of confession is to recognize within a safe and loving environment all the thought patterns that keep us from being ourselves. By talking about and confessing our thoughts and deeds we begin to accept ourselves. All negative actions can ultimately be traced to our negative, often unconscious thoughts, which in turn can be traced back to the misconduct of generations before us. We generally believe that we are pretty good people and only a few of our deeds are evil. Many people dismiss their mistakes and are unable to admit even one wrongdoing. Could we look deeply enough, we would see that sins begin in our minds, and that we ourselves cheat on us dozens if not hundreds of times every day. Then we could see that deep inside us, the worst negative judgments are hidden about ourselves. Talking about these judgments and the resulting thoughts and deeds out loud results in accepting ourselves as sinners. When we talk about it with someone else, we demonstrate: “I’m important enough to talk about my mistakes. You’re important enough to get to know my innermost.”Together we will demonstrate: we are both sinners. We realized that we deceive ourselves in a thousand ways. We will commit ourselves to our divine spark. We want to put all these debts into the hands of God and trust that will change them in us. Given this idea the honest conversation with a good friend in whom you confide your feelings can be this holy confession.